I HAVE therefore I AM...

I was reading my book on the train this morning on my way into the office and I had an AH-HA moment...

it said:

"... The concept of "ownership" is a fiction created by the EGO to give itself solidity and permanency and make itself stand out, make itself special. Since you cannot "Find" yourself through "having", however, there is another more powerful drive underneath is that pertains to the structure of the ego: the need for more- which we cold also call wanting. No EGO can last for long without the need for more. Therefore, WANTING keeps the EGO alive much more than HAVING. The EGO wants to want more than it wants to have. And so, the shallow satisfaction of having is always replaced by more wanting..."

"the ego tends to equate having with BEING- I have therefore I AM. And the more I have, the more I am. The EGO lives through comparison, how you are seen by others turns into how you see yourself"


hmmmm.. interesting concept! naturally, this new thought sparked this morning's self examination... I had became aware of myself in a way I had never known before... Made me ponder on just WHAT LIES HAS MY EGO TOLD ME, hmm? And WHY have I become attached to these transitional, temporary " things" that I can not take with me when I pass on?  Have I equated my my sense of BEING to what I have and do not have? ( which is why so many women feel LESS than when they dont have a mate?)

Wow.. so my mind began to search- turning over every cornerstone of every waking thought I've ever said, felt, expressed or thought-

I heard my EGO saying...

" that's just ME son, LIKE it or not. I've always been this way, NAH, I'm not into that- I deserve this- HE's MINE- you cant talk to me like that- do you know who I AM?"

oh yeah? just exactly WHO AM I? who are WE? Have you ever questioned yourself about those things you have become attached to? is it your home? is it your job? is it your friends? is your country, your history or your children? How about your family? and if ANY ONE of these things were taken away from you- would you be any less than.... you?


Would I be any less than...Me?(Gosh I hope not)

Are my friends MINE? And does my husband/lover/partner truly BELONG to me just because we had a ceremony? it is my EGO that cant stand knowing he had another life, had a past before I came along? Is it my EGO that makes me feel bad when he says HE wants to have another wife? Am I really not able to handle being a co-wife or am I just worried about what people would think of me? Wasnt I somebody's mistress before- and what exactly is the difference? Have my EGO convinced me that I DESERVE BETTER- I DESERVE TO HAVE A BIGGER HOUSE- MORE SALARY,  MY "OWN" SPOUSE and my OWN COMPANY? And JUST how much of it can I take with me?

interesting...

YOU see- its interesting to me to see just how we've been sold a dream...a SICKNESS called the ILLUSION of ME and MINE passed down since the beginning of time consisting of this and that which I  DECIDED to IDENTIFY with... and EQUATE with... ME

What is permanent? Is my sense of BEING Transitory and dependent upon how many friends leave me comments on a daily basis on MYSPACE? if it is- then I will never be satisfied- no, Everything in this world is transitional, constantly moving, with each day dying, drifting and shifting, and I HAVE is a farce...

OWNERSHIP is an illusion- an intrusion on the reality- because as far as I can see

WE

all belong to ALLAH and when he calls for us..

GUESS what?

all the things you are attached to, thought DEFINED you- thought that you could not live without, would actually FIGHT a bitch in the street about--- become insignificant because possessions are like trying to hold sand in your hands... the tighter the grip- the more you end up with ....

NADA!



now... let it ISH marinate---one time for your mind!

BE the awareness of the things you think you are- and know that YOU are not any of those things... whoYOU are superceeds all that you think you are-

Ponder and reflect on that.... family!

PEACE!