Islamic Renewal - Thoughts and feelings after and Islamic experience

Assalamu alaykum

From Friday till Sunday I attended an Islamic confrence here in Toronto, known as Reviving the Islamic Spirit (RIS). The confrence consisted of many speakers, all quite knowledgable about Islam.

For many years now (and it saddens me to say) I've been struggling with my faith. I have probably never so openly admitted that. But I was. I found it hard to keep up with my prayer, profanity plagued my speech, the opposite sex was not unfamilliar terrority. And I don't feel self conscious saying this. Because almost EVERY youth I have EVER met has faced the same struggles. Allah knows all our weaknesses.

Anyway, I've had a few experiences simillar to this. I tell myself "I can change. I WILL change." and the change occurs. But then, somewhere in between the change stops. Not very abrubtly, but gradually i begin to slack off again.

This weekend for some reason i was gripped with a feeling i cant explain to anyone. I have no idea how to. But its a feeling that is beyond any other. My soul felt as if it was being washed. Emotion took over during many of the powerful lectures i was privledged to listen to. And by the last speech my eyes were probably red, my eyeliner smudged, and my throat tight from holding back tears. I think I will call this experience "Gripped by the MERCY of Allah (swt)". That is the best way i can describe it.

One particular speaker really hit home with me. Tariq Ramadan, an islamic philospher, spoke about two things. First, Radical Reform. The idea that we need to CHANGE by TRANSFORMING not merely ADAPTING. Many of the points he raised are things i've always deeply believed and I could defineltly relate to what he was saying. The second thing he spoke about was finding spirituality. And this is where for some reason, my soul woke up. A light was turned on in me, and i hope to God it never goes out again.

Tariq Ramadan mentioned that to be a spiritual person you need DISCPINLINE. Yeah, yeah. That's old news. But he went on to give the example of a musician. A musician needs to work and work to perfect an instrument, until one day it seems effortless. "It seems as if they are flying, and not even thinking about what they are playing." Simillarly with spirituality, you need to work and work (and not slack off, as i had so many times in the past) until it is as if you are flying. And it is effortless like you don't even need to think about it; you just do it. And how do you work and work at it? Simply by incorporating it in EVERYTHING that you do. when dealing with people, when eating, when praying, when ANYTHING, you do it the way Rasulullah (s) and Allah (swt) have told us to. And soon enough, everything you do is being done the right way; the spiritual way. I have probably completely butchered what that amazing man said, but that's the best way i can explain it.

The last thing I want to mention is the intense admiration of Rasulullah (S) i gained this weeked. I always knew about how amazing he was, but for some reason this weekend it really clicked. And it's just so wonderful to know WE ARE HIS UMMAH! MashaAllah. We are so blessed to be part of something so great. 15,000 people attended the confrence, and the feeling of unity and brotherhood was undeniable. It was really beautiful and i've never felt more proud to be a Muslim. I thank Allah for this experience.

I encourage everyone to find their light, because no love is greater than that of Allah (swt).

Walaykum asalaam

Biba :)

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Habiba Habiba is online
4 months ago

i need to read this myself.

BlueSajeda BlueSajeda is offline
5 months ago

Birds of the same feather flock together. If you surround yourself with good Muslims, you will feel automatically inclined to Islam. If you surround yourself with bad people, you will reap the whirwind of your sythe that you threw. This is a commonly knowing thing. Why else do people feel more religious in Ramadhan than in other time? It's not because something magical happends between the first day of Ramadhan and the day before. It's because people surround themselves with more Muslims during Ramadhan hence they feel more religious and spiritual.

Arabian Arabian is offline
5 months ago

i wish i can attend such a conference one day ... meet & greet people from all cultures who have one shared belief & taqwa (similar to Hajj but with out the pushing & shoving) jok .. just came back from Hajj so i still have the illusion

Salam

socialist1 socialist1 is offline
5 months ago

Thankyou for sharing that with us sister it was very enlightening.

Marwa2009 Marwa2009 is offline
5 months ago

Assalamu Alaikum Biba,

I went to the same conference than you and I too gained a spiritual boost. I was struggling with prayers before and I still struggle but alhamdulillah, I have many effort for making prayers my priority and Allah is helping me. Alhamdulillah, I am now making my prayers on time. Even yesterday, I was struggling and did all my prayers and I was late doing some of them. Today, I feel better energy and iman. And I need to continue to stick to it. It is funny that you mention Tarek Ramadan because I was just listenning to his CD (his talk on Sunday at the conference that I missed) and subhaanAllah, just when I needed to hear about discipline. I liked his example on Musician. Today after praying dhur, I almost jumped with happiness and joy thanking Allah for helping getting out of my prison (prison of nafs and that's another topic T. Ramadan talked about).

If you are reading this, please make a dua that I keep strenghtening my iman and cleansing my soul with Quran. My enemy is procastination and laziness, then stress and overwhelming feelings of having too much to do. I think I know what the problem is: when we don't make time for Allah, Allah takes time away from us!

May Allay keep us all on the straight path.
May Allah protect our brothers and sisters in Palestine, Iraq, Somalia, Afghanistan and everywhere else from the enemies. May Allah punish those who are bombarding children and women and all innocent civilians. May Allay unite the Muslim Ummah.

Muslim_Sister Muslim_Sister is offline
6 months ago

Assalamu Alaikum, dear sister in Islam! I pray this finds you in the best of health and in the highest Imaan.

MashAllah what a beautiful and emotional experience you have encounted at the RIS confrence, indeed as human beings we all need to work hard at building and awaking our souls and what a best way in doing it by being with 15,000 Muslims in one space. MashAllah sister, I'm proud and happy to hear that your soul was granted the light of good and inshallah this wonderful feeling you have experiences shall never end and may it carry you through the doors of Jannah. Ameen.

Stay happy and connected with Islam and in your prayers please remember our brothers and sisters in Gaza, who are suffering daily in the hands of the enemis of Allah (SWT). Our Dua's is the strongest weapons so please everyone who read this make a Dua for our mothers, children, brothers, sisters and fathers of Palestinian. May Allah shower HIS mercy on them and May Allah protect masjid Al-Aqsa from the violence of the Israeli army. Ameen Ya Allah!