As
we near the end of what I call "Candy Season"-- a term that begins at
Halloween and lasts through January 1st -- and approach the "Dour
Season" of ambitious New Year's resolutions, I have a few thoughts on
how to manage children's intake of fun compelling garbage like sweets,
snacks, and TV.
Too many parents end up locked in constant battles over these forms of mindless fun, attempting to fend off their child's desire, or completely restrict their access. This often ends up backfiring as a) kids love a fight, as it provides them a template and opportunity for engagement, and b) absolute limitations create a countervailing -- and often stronger -- desire for transgression.
We all know just how alluring junk can be. We all know just how good it feels to indulge. And we all (even kids) deserve some wanton happiness. So the goal -- as with most things with young children -- should not be to attempt to completely quash this profound desire, but to teach your kids how to have a healthy relationship with it.
Instead of creating unconditional and impossible rules and expectations, try what I call the Co-Option Option (COO). Make clear protocols about when and for what duration treats like candy, snacks, and television can be consumed, and then stick to them.
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